While I was in high school and the beginning of my college years, I always heard the importance of dating a “Christian man”. So in high school and college, I did just that. I flirted, talked or “vibed” with Christian men. However, they did not reflect Christ at all. Yes, they came to church with me, they didn’t curse, or party hard, or drink, but they weren’t forgiving or gracious. Instead, they fed my jealous insecurities and reminded me of my past mistakes. It wasn’t until I met my sweet Husband (hey darling) did I really understand the importance of understanding the difference between a Christian man and a die-hard Godly man. The following are a few pointers of the difference between the two, and are by no means a complete list:
- A godly man has walked with the Lord long enough to realize that being a Christ follower is not just an appearance thing. Rather, it is a lifestyle and they are in a real relationship with the Lord, and the evidence being that their life is changed on a daily basis. A boy thinks being a Christian is an appearance, where you do all the right things.
- A godly man treats you well because you are beautiful, enough, and worthy to be treated well. A boy treats you well when it benefits him. Boys are self-seeking, while a godly man is selfless.
- A man knows the boundaries while in courtship. A man knows that true love waits and that it is a sacrifice and a commitment. A boy does sweet things, and says words like “I love you” to push towards sexual immorality or another agenda that is most likely selfish. I godly man holds his passions and desires for where they belong: in marriage.
- A godly man understands the importance of being in the world and listening to the Holy Spirit. It is of great significance to him to be mentored, teachable, and willing to learn from older (spiritually) godly men. A boy makes a decision without seeking wisdom from the guidance that the Lord has put in place for us.
- A godly man will encourage you to work on your insecurities the right way by understanding your identity which is rooted in Christ. A boy will only use your insecurities to manipulate you or feed them. A godly man will want to encourage you, guide you, and direct you to the feet of Christ first before he tries to get you to focus on him.
- A godly man will not leave you wondering what is happening in the relationship and string you along in confusion. Instead, he will make his intentions clear, he will not play with your heart because he will have to face the Lord Jesus Christ. He will be honest and mindful of your heart and emotions.
- A godly man knows that change only happens when you invest time in your relationship with the Lord. A boy will think that he can fix his own problems and change.
Beloved, I hope when you are looking for a man, it is a godly man. A man who does not want to waste your time, emotions, and energy. Do not settle. Do not compromise. And absolutely do not let go of your standards.
( P.S Leave comment and let me know what you think. Looking forward to reading your thoughts.)